Saturday, August 31, 2013

Cedar Point summer recap

Soooooo, last year I got lazy and skipped my end of contract Facebook recap of greatness so I wanted to make sure I made it happen this summer :) I have had the pleasure of working with most all of you in prior contracts, and it has been so great to be reunited again this summer. For the most part I would like to think we nailed it this summer. Between the hangovers, reblocks, and late nights there have been many memorable moments in the 3 short months at Cedar Point.

  I guess it would be most appropriate for me to start off by thanking you all for the impressive 14 sets of Dirty donuts this summer, not to mention the donuts that should have been! I do not think I have ever seen even close to that brought in during any of my contracts for 10 years of ice shows, so why don't you all give yourselves a pat on the back. I was enjoying the fact that earning donuts started becoming a contest mid way through the summer. You nailed it guys (literally)

 This summer however was not the summer for cell phones. So my phone which was dropped in a toilet after to many shots last October finally died a slow death this summer. I eventually upgraded and got a new one..... which I then dropped and shattered into a billion pieces only 2 short weeks later! 100$ later I have a almost brand new-brand new phone again. Laura's phone broke and had to be replaced, only to fall into Trey's pool with the new replacement phone still in her pocket. Thanks to Justin who got her, her new-used phone. Kinsey lost her phone in the backseat of some strange mans car and was without it for 5 days, only to have a random bum steal it off the table while she was having dinner in Cleavland.  Another week later she had an actual brand new phone. Lets not forget Courtney's phone being dropped the last week of the summer and breaking her screen. At least the story prompted a very fun safety meeting ;) I  just learned that Amanda also dropped and cracked her screen pretty early into the contract! Yikes we are a bunch of butter fingers.

 During our first few weeks how could we forget when Spiderman (AKA Andy) made a guest apperance during one of our last non dress runs. Topping that off was Ryan and Amanda's special costume debut for their color number in their barely there Nudes! I think they should have used those costumes all summer, would have made for much bigger crowds I am sure. I almost forgot the primary red crayon Saturday crop dusting of death. All I can say is that I am thankful I am in the dog and did not catch a whiff of that on the ice. Random side note: The amount of times poor Dotes forgot to wear show underwear was 3, which is about 3 times to many to shove your boy shorts up your booty ;) Also for you stage right residents, one day while getting ready for Opening, Robin decided to start putting on Kinsey's leo.... on top of her own leo that she was already wearing.

 I would personally like to thank you all for supplying your boobs, butts, tongues, and other body parts for photo shoots with the temporary tats. I have a folder on my computer with over 175 pics of the greatness that you all supplied me with! Your participation in the fun was greatly appreciated. BTW Courtney says she is going to bring fake tats next summer and tell you she has a contest just to get you all naked...... do not fall for it haha

 We had quite the impressive social calendar this summer I would say. Granted I hardly attended any of the late nights, I enjoyed hearing everyone's stories during the van rides to work. Between the Goodwill party, The Pink party, The margarita Monday, the many girls nights and poker nights, Naked and afraid night, The fines party/drinking game palooza, Farm Party, Katie and Trey's place, WWE Raw night, and closing night at crush, I think we did a pretty good job at themed parties!

 To my fellow gym rats I appreciated Sandusky's selection of people watching more so than any summers past! I know Harold usually holds down the fort with his daily selection of crop tops, but he was slacking this summer in his old age. Between the girl in her booty shorts creating her own exercises, the large man in very distracting tight spandex outfits, the elderly woman who hauls ass on the treadmill in a floor length skirt, Mason's twin who was actually a little gym monkey and very fun to watch workout..... I feel like Sandusky's finest joined the gym this summer.

 Laura Hudson: I am sorry for making you face your fears this summer for everyone's amusement with the Gremlins.... if nothing else it made for a great video montage, and amused me greatly!!!!
 Special thanks to Andy and Laura for remaking crayons in heavy metal version. That was by far one of the greatest renditions of that song that could ever be made! I enjoyed hearing the practice runs, the studio version, and the live versions.... horrifying yet amazing :) All the Tuesday kareoke nights were not only very entertaining but just proved how talented everyone really is not only on the ice.

 It's been a great week back at home to say the least, and I hope you all are also settling back in and enjoying some time off skates because I know I sure am!!! ;) Not to mention chopping off the tip of my big toe Monday morning as we were leaving to go to the airport.... to bad it did not happen just one day sooner, we could have added yet another reblock to the list. Thanks roomies for emergency toe surgery, it is starting to slowly heal and not be so fear factor looking any longer.  I will miss you all and can not wait to work/play with you again in the future. Its great groups like we always have in The Dusk that always keep me coming back for more summer after summer(even when I say I am not going to) So thank you all for my 4th fun summer in Sandusky.

Friday, August 16, 2013

Showgirl Supplements

So us showgirls can be 18 years old and have the bodies of 60 year olds. After 10 years of show skating I have found daily supplementation is mandatory. Years of training and falling and abuse eventually takes it's toll on your body. Here is my personal list of the basic supplements that I take every day to help keep my body working properly, and to help keep my limbs from detaching.

These are the exact products I purchase on the regular:

First off is a Fish Oil.......

This is a GNC product to help with my joints. My knee surgeon suggested Krill Oil as the best type of fish oil for my bodies needs. It delivers superior omega-3 fatty acids, EPA and DHA, compared to other omega-3 source. These omega-3 fatty acids are uniquely bound to phospholipids, enhancing their absorption. Here is a link to where you can purchase it

Second is Biotin....
Biotin promotes healthy hair, skin, and nails! So the abuse from wigs, character heads, head pieces can be taxing on your hair. I also tend to break nails often during quick changes, and don't forget the abuse our faces take from applying 5 coats of makeup every day before the show. You can use any brand, I feel they all work just as good as eachother, I personally just grab it from GNC when I am already there purchasing other products
You can order this product here.......
Next I use GNC Liquid Triflex. This one is very very important that I take because I find I personally get great results in my joint pain. Now I know I already mentioned a fish oil, but this also contains Glucosamine and Chondroitin which helps rebuild cartilage. This product promotes joint flexibility and mobility. I get the liquid because it gets in your system quicker then tablets. Warning.. this product does not taste very awesome. They way I think of it is, if I can down a shot of Jack, I can manage to throw a shot of this back every morning and just chase it with some OJ. I was experiencing bad knee pain awhile back and within 1 weeks time I felt a noticeable difference and I can tell when I have been skipping doses. You can get this here.....

Glutamine is the most abundant free amino acid in the body. Amino acids are the building blocks of protein. Glutamine is produced in the muscles and is distributed by the blood to the organs it needs. It promotes healing and recovery. I use powder, flavorless Glutamine in my shakes once a day. Glutamine is used for improving recovery after bone marrow transplant or bowel surgery, increasing well-being in people who have suffered traumatic injuries, and preventing infections in critically ill people. You can also take it in pill form, I just prefer to take supplements in liquid or powder form if possible to assure I get the most out of it.

Last would just be a womens multivitamin. I take one that has green tea extract in it also. Green tea slows the breakdown of cartilage and provides relief to patients suffering from arthritis.The antioxidants present in green tea extract are responsible for slowing down the aging process of the body, and it is good to help speed up your metabolism.

This does not complete my personal list of day to day supplements that I consume. I take proteins, pre-workouts, meal replacements, and some times fat burners. I hope that this information becomes useful to those of you who just take your gummy vitamins here and there because they taste fun and look like candy. Take care of your body, because it is the only one you get, and if you want to continue getting a paycheck you may want to keep it as healthy as possible :)

The last scoop is always the saddest :(



Friday, August 9, 2013

Things you never hear at a 9-5 job

 Most jobs have rules, and guidelines that must be followed to a T. They care about things such as foul language, personal jokes, and vulgar topics. Backstage at an ice show it is slightly different. Of course there are lines that should not be crossed, and yet usually are... but when you are back stage almost fully naked in a co-ed dressing room you tend to get pretty comfortable pretty quickly. It is quite normal to compliment your friend on how cute their underwear is that day. You see lots of funny things, and hear things that people sitting behind a desk would never hear at work, or at the very least wouldn't get a slap on the wrist for saying such things. Here is a list of some of my favorite one liners said in the workplace that nobody seemed to think was unacceptable in any way shape or form, and made complete sense to the people who were hearing them. Good thing there is no HR office in ice shows.... or is there? SHHHHHHHHHHH

-I know how your going to die...Lets just say your going to choke on something
-Everyone is going to a rave right now, and I am going to Sea World to be a damn Penguin Wahhhhhhhh
-When a monkey nibbles on a penis, it's funny in any language
-I am going to McSlap the shit out of you
-Its almost midnight, when are you bringing the cupcakes
-Grandma got run over by my Facebook and then she died. Maybe if I wasn't such a whore on Facebook.... Grandma would still be alive
-Q: Do you watch American Horror Story A: It just feels so good to be a hero ya know?!?!
-MMMM Beer and Apple Jacks taste so good
-Sorry... I wasn't sure if I was going to yawn, burp, or throw up
-I could really go for a spork right now
-I wonder what 11AM looks like
-These shoes SCREAM free shots do they not?
-Age does not exist when your drunk
-I am pretty sure I am sleeping on a giant Lego
-That shirt SCREAMS I like it in the ass
-Things you NEVER want to hear in the hot tub... "I am still going to rape your sister"
-This tastes like chick peas and horse shit
-There is a Gremlin in my uterus
-Is that a mole on your face or a piece of chocolate?
-All I smell is BBQ and regrets
-Poptarts to you are what booze is to Shane
-Maybe you need a donut, and by donut I mean penis
-I am going to milk that squirt
-There are 7 buttons separating me from the toilet
-When you wank, you get wet
-I think the Mormonade is kicking in
-I was sober until I was 6, but then I turned 7
-Hey Phil, I can see your balls again
-Oh no, my underwear just ripped!
-Camel toes are for families too
-I saw a hole and I just went for it
-This is what happens when you give an anorexic skater a Martini
-You are the fattest skinny girl I have ever met!
-Lets compare buttholes
-Damn you Snoopy, what did you do with my cell phone?
-5 minute call for Fred the seagull's memorial service
-Oh no, you are Charlie Sheen again
-That is some serious butt Tar Tar you got there
-You have to determine the size of the hole before you can properly fix it
-Bike Shoe
-I speared my bill
-Get it Whoreman
-Is gnome your final answer?
-G-Damn you mother fucking lace! I mean......... oops
-Sometimes I like to be the big spoon
-Clam box, I love my clam box
-Does anybody want to play dance belt bingo today?
-If today was my last day, I would most likely go to a buffet
-I sang a song this morning about pasta sauce and a T-Rex
-When was the last time you ate?..... 1985
-Then, she grabbed my fur skin
-Fist pumps for freedom
-I am allergic to latex- Thank god you are Mormon
-Last night I threw up everything except my memories
-You are such a  Whore-asarus Rex

The list  continues for ages and ages, but these are just some of my favorites in recent contracts that come to mind. Now all of you who have to say Yes maam, Yes Sir, Good evening, Please, Thank you, Have a nice day in the workplace when all you want to say is Fuck off, Slut, Penis,whore, while looking at your friends butts and boobs all day.... be jealous haha ;)